Dating for Older Women: Dating Tips Post COVID-19
The window washers came to my home last week. My windows were dirty and streaked.
They started the work in my office, where I have a huge desk overlooking a lovely street scene. I love looking out whenever I take a moment's pause in my work.
However, my desk was cluttered with all kinds of piles of paper. I had to place pile upon pile and move all papers from my desk.
When they left, I wondered, “What shall I do with these papers?” I decided to clean up my act and put them into a system in my file drawers (I have lots of room there).
Now my desk is so clean and organized (after several hours of sorting) that I thought I should take a picture of it. Somewhat emboldened, I went through my closet and threw out some old clothes that I hadn’t worn for years. It’s not that there was much clutter elsewhere, but I suddenly felt so much freer.
I’ve cleared up most of the clutter of my life, too. As I became clearer and clearer about the values I had about the people in my life, the quality of my relationships cleared up. Besides being with a fantastic man for over two years, my relationships with other friends are getting deeper.
We’re leaving the period of Covid panic (hopefully), but no one really knows what to expect in the post-Covid world. Relationships have been on hold for several years.
Now is the time to look closely at your values and how you feel about relationships. You can clear up the clutter of dysfunctional relationships. Remember that relationships are perhaps the most powerful way to control your life, health, and longevity.
Yes, it takes time and energy to establish great relationships. Sometimes it takes a lot of courage. But do you really want to settle for mediocre time spent with people?
I cannot promise you heaven on earth, but I believe your life will improve, and there’s a much better chance of success in a shorter time frame. Now is the time to clear up the clutter of past relationship blunders, baggage, and hurt feelings.
Now is the time to take stock of your life and go for the brass ring of deep loving relationships. Let's discuss how you can quickly clear up relationship baggage as you re-enter the dating world post-Covid. You deserve to find the deep, loving relationships you desire.
Be Mindful and Focus On Yourself
Baggage from previous relationships takes root in your brain, way in the back where it's hard to get to. You should try to bring your thoughts to the present by focusing on the current version of yourself.
You should appreciate who you are in the present instead of focusing on who you used to be. While every experience you've been through has shaped you into who you are today, it doesn't define you. Leave what happened to you in previous relationships in the past.
Find the Lesson
It can be frustrating to always look for a lesson in an unpleasant experience, but it's a beneficial exercise. Looking for a lesson in past relationships can help you feel lighter. You have to learn the lesson, so you don't keep repeating the same mistakes.
Some common lessons people learn from previous relationships are setting boundaries and learning to love themselves while being on their own. Once you understand those lessons, it's easier to move on to the next phase in your life.
Just as I purged my desk and closet of unwanted items, you need to do the same for your past relationships. Physical changes can help you move on from previous relationships, such as getting a new haircut. Making those minor tweaks can help alter your subconscious mind as you work toward a new life.
It's also helpful to get rid of things around your home that remind you of past relationships. This includes gifts or pictures. You want to remove physical baggage since it might be triggering for you to look at.
Acknowledge Your Past
Acknowledging your baggage or emotional ghosts isn't about blaming the other person. No matter what happened in your past, you have to remember that you're in control. You can either control your baggage, or it'll control you.
Don't focus on blaming the other person. You're not a victim. If you stay in the victim mindset, you could repeat certain behaviors in the future.
Be Clear With What Your Values Are
Before you start dating again, you should be clear about what you're looking for in a relationship. You should compile a list of what your non-negotiable requirements are in a relationship.
A need isn't the same thing as a want. "Wants" include physical characteristics and are a bonus on top of what you need. They're not necessarily required for a relationship's foundation.
Needs are things that are needed to establish a healthy relationship. It could include wanting open communication. Be clear with your future partner about what your needs are, and if they can't fulfill them, then they're not right for you.
Get Help With Dating for Older Women
Dating for older women can be complicated. It's hard to let go of the things that happened in our past, but it's important to have meaningful relationships in our future. Clearing the clutter from the past will help you develop loving relationships, both platonic and romantic.
I can help you move forward into the post-Covid dating world. Reach out to me to learn more about signing up for one of my dating webinars.